Bumpersticker of the year?
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So, we have a Bible Baptist church in Fairbanks, with a giant electronic reader board that constantly displays obnoxious messages like "MOTHER EARTH?!/YOUR MOTHER IS A DIRT BALL" and "YOU'RE SO OPEN MINDED/YOUR BRAINS FELL OUT". Lovely people really.
Which is why I literally laughed out loud when I spotted this bumper sticker in the grocery store parking lot today:
BIBLE BAPTISTS:
We hate you more than God does.
We hate you more than God does.
Bumper sticker of the year, or what? (And you can now buy one from my bumper sticker store!)
I read the bumper sticker before reading your post content. I laughed out loud as well after reading it. We have tons of Mormons here in Vegas and I could insert them into the tag line. Most of my friends are Mormon so I can go ahead and bag on them and feel OK…
24th June 2008 at 11:11 pm | permalink |That works for me, except it's not rude enough.
I don't think I've experienced a single situation where an insult to a God-botherer couldn't be improved by tagging, "you fucking inbred prick stain" on the end.
25th June 2008 at 12:06 am | permalink |lol that's for sure.
Could you take a picture please ^_^
25th June 2008 at 12:27 am | permalink |@Kevin: You could substitute almost any distinctly-named, relatively recent Christian sect in the place of "BIBLE BAPTISTS.
What I can't figure out is how they don't realize their hateful bullshit isn't bringing anyone to Jesus … which is supposedly what they're trying to do.
@Pettsvaldo: Well, adding a third line to a bumper sticker makes the whole thing a lot less legible at legal traffic distances. ;-)
@baley: I'm still kicking myself for not whipping out the camera phone. If/when I see that vehicle again, I'm TOTALLY taking a picture.
25th June 2008 at 2:18 am | permalink |Ugh, that's just horrendously obnoxious. I live just around the corner from a Lutheran church with a notice board out the front - though not a flashing one. I thought the shit they but up on there was bad, but in hindsight it's just stupid. Those baptists… fuck me, that's asking to be firebombed.
Our local fundies just put up stuff like "No-one can play the part God created for you in His plan" or something to that effect. Which is followed the next day by something about free will. I'm half convinced they're just taking the piss it's so stupidly contradictory. 'You're doing exactly as God wants' but 'You have free will'. Right.
Fucking wankers >.>
25th June 2008 at 7:54 am | permalink |I vote for my bumper-sticker. ;-)
25th June 2008 at 8:11 am | permalink |I gotta get me one of those bumper stickers!
25th June 2008 at 8:50 am | permalink |@grimbles: We've got other churches that just put up stupid stuff, but the Bible Baptists are truly special assholes. hehe
@Becca: That's it. I totally need to start a bumper sticker store here…
@alapoet: By the end of the day, you'll be able to get 'em here. :-)
25th June 2008 at 10:48 am | permalink |@grimbles - Which is followed the next day by something about free will. I'm half convinced they're just taking the piss it's so stupidly contradictory. 'You're doing exactly as God wants' but 'You have free will'. Right.
Actually its just a standard take on a fairly standard 'destiny' vs 'free will' argument, they have just taken the destiny side and called it 'Gods Will'.
Effectively the whole argument is irrelevant as your actions are the same in both cases.
25th June 2008 at 3:49 pm | permalink |Reminds me of one of my favorite quotations.
"We have to believe in free will. We've got no choice." ~ Isaac Bashevis Singer
:-)
25th June 2008 at 4:02 pm | permalink |Haha, it's like when I laugh at racist jokes. I laugh, yet I know it's wrong to. I try to respect others religions, even if I disagree with them. Even if they have "obnoxious messages". xD
I like knowing I'm the bigger person. This is still pretty funny though. =]
25th June 2008 at 6:32 pm | permalink |@Ian: The problem there, I think, is that they're supporting determinism one day, and free will the next.
But then, I don't know that an avowed belief in virgin births and invisible omnipotent beings says much about one's logical thinking faculties in the first place. ;)
@alapoet: That's a good one!
@Aimee: See, I'm totally respectful when religious people are respectful of me … but these guys broadcast their assholery in three-foot-high glowing letters on the side of the road, so I figure they're fair game. Do unto others is *their* rule, after all. hehe
25th June 2008 at 7:46 pm | permalink |I used to have many fantasies about ways to destroy that sign whenever I passed it on my way home. I worked with an old time Fairbanksian who hated it as well. She said that sign was something someone would have taken an axe to in the old days. I, myself, just wanted take an AK47 to it.
Also, I wanted to donate to your puppy fund, but I'm currently paying off a $3600 vet bill for an emergency very complicated bloat surgery for my Rottie. Glad yours is okay now. I had to get that off my chest because I've been having guilt pangs whenever I come to this site and see the cute puppy.
25th June 2008 at 9:03 pm | permalink |@akshelby: I know a woman who's family went there, and she says the sign has been shot loads of times.
I'm thinking shotgun … except it's tall enough you'd have to use a really hot load to do enough damage at that height. ;-)
And no worries about Gidget … glad your dog is OK too! (S/he is OK, right?) A friend of mine needed emergency bloat surgery for her Dane recently … scary stuff there.
25th June 2008 at 9:22 pm | permalink |Hmm…….an elephant gun might do the trick then? Rocket launcher?
I'm glad I don't live there anymore or the police might be knocking on my door the next time it gets shot.
Yes, Max is totally fine now. He had a 50% chance of dying even after the surgery but he's up and prancing about now.
26th June 2008 at 10:20 am | permalink |An elephant gun would be great. :-) Or a little explosive "belt" around the base of the support post? Hmm. Never played with demolitions before. That could be fun! :D
Glad Max pulled through!
26th June 2008 at 11:39 am | permalink |well. I will say this… that dirtball joke is actually very funny.
28th June 2008 at 10:16 am | permalink |@pedro: It's one of those jokes that's only funny depending on who says it. ;-)
28th June 2008 at 7:39 pm | permalink |I think it's the context more than the who. IE, someone who's just taking the piss, actually as a joke, sure. But plastering on a billboard, that's aggressive and not funny.
29th June 2008 at 2:58 am | permalink |