So, what about YOUR marriage, HMMMM???

Feel free to stalk our every post with the f*cking c*nts RSS feed, subscribe to f-ckingc-nts.com by email, follow our new posts and random comments on Twitter, or become a fan on facebook. Go on. You know you want to! All the cool kids are doing it …And, to bitch a little more about [...]

Fuck you, California.

Y'know, I have many reasons to dislike California. There's the overcrowding. There's the interminable cultural void that is the entire Southern half of the state. There's the fact that they regularly manage to suck the Colorado river dry before it reaches the ocean, because people think they need lawns, golf courses, and fucking PALM TREES [...]

The Daily Show: Last Stand of American Journalism?

So, we have the comedian facing off against the "financial commentator" … and tearing CNBC to small raggedy bits in the process. I don't think it says much for American Journalism being "the Fourth Estate" of our government when a show on Comedy Central calls the shots cleaner than any news program in existence, but [...]

Reason No. 3* I will never move to the UK

(Really, this ought to be reason #1, but it's the third reason I became aware of, chronologically speaking.)
In the UK, the police can raid your home based on "unusual heat patterns" spotted via aerial infrared photos. Indeed, it seems that aerial surveillance is the order of the day over there. At least the Telegraph article [...]

Wake up America! Palin/McCain are fucking AWFUL!

OK, enough of the Sarah Palin crap … Obama might have only been talking about McCain's policies when he said "lipstick on a pig," but I'm not. I'm talking about McCain's entire candidacy … and as far as I'm concerned, that's all Palin was: Lipstick for a pig of a presidential candidate. And it's not [...]

R.I.P. George Carlin

A true genius, in my book. A man who had his head on straight, and his priorities well sorted. The world needs more people like George Carlin: People who are willing to tell it like it is, other people's sacred cows be damned.
Take some time to watch some of his stand-up routines, and make a [...]

On the Web: Abstinence Education for Boys & Girls

I really wish these two sites were a lot bigger … the funny doesn't last long enough:

a testimonial from Crystal F.: "I used to suffer terribly from dirty dreams about boys. Thankfully, now my Iron Hymen Libido-Be-Gone™ thong panties keep my dreams clean – and my yucky cooter bone-dry!"

a testimonial from Zach P.: "Premarital sex [...]

10 Things Every Adult Should Know

Sometimes it's hard to come up with a full-length, balls-to-the-wall rant, but a lot of "too long for Twitter, too short for a whole post" ideas float in and out of my head all the time. Here's 10 things every adult really ought to know, but a lot of people are apparently just too fucking [...]

The Ultimate Civil Libertarian

… or, keep your laws out of my bedroom, off my body, and away from my pipe!
That's me. I am the ultimate civil libertarian … a small sampling of my cherished beliefs regarding personal freedom.

Legalize gay marriage … not only should homosexuals have the same rights to make themselves miserable as straight people have, but [...]

routine infant mutilation: how fucking barbaric can you get?

See now, when you read that headline, you agreed instantly, didn't you? "Infant mutilation?! Good gracious, nobody could get behind that!" Yeah, nobody except for the parents of 70% of the men in the United States … quite possibly including you, dear reader. Yes, YOU. I personally know the list includes my mother and the [...]