Holy Fuck, Crossdressing Children! Rally the Fundies!
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A heretofore unimagined threat has descended upon the moral fiber of the great Yew Ess of Ey … indeed. You thought it was the gay scout leaders or lesbian gym instructors who were going to turn your children down the path of sin, perversion and homosexuality? No indeed, it appears the greatest threat to your children's natural righteousness comes from within the herd.
School administrators in Reedsburg, Wisconsin thought they were safe letting their Elementary School students pick their own dress up themes for the annual Wacky Week event, wherein the children can dress up according to a different whimsical theme each day of the week. The children, however, chose Friday to be "Opposite Day," as in, "dress up like the opposite gender." And thus, the innocence of this provincial Wisconsin town was destroyed by the nefarious machinations of cross dressing children.
(Yeah, I know, I have been kinda slamming on the fundies a lot lately. Maybe I'm getting lazy, and going after the easy targets? Dunno. But they make it so fucking EASY!)
So yeah. Every year at the kids at Pineview Elementary submit dress up theme ideas for Wacky Week, and then all the students vote on them. This year Friday was voted in as "opposite day/old people day". The kids could dress as the opposite gender, or as grandma or grandpa (theoretically, I guess the overachievers could combine the two themes, and dress like an elderly member of the opposite sex). The school sent out notices of the dress-up schedule to all the students' families. Not a peep of objection was raised, and Wacky Week went on as scheduled.
Then the local fundies got wind of it.
Little did the administrators or students realize they were insidiously indoctrinating their innocent student body in the deviant ways of cross dressing. Milwaukee-based Voice of Christian Youth America got wind of the debauchery, and uptight fuckwit talk show hosts Jim Schneider, Vic Eliason and Ingrid Schlueter dutifully interrupted their broadcast to put out the alarm. And yea verily, the wrath of small-minded, god-fearing Midwestern America descended upon the school (regardless of whether or not the fundie freaks actually lived in Pineview's school district).
Because god knows, every little boy who's pranced around the house wearing his sister's necklaces grew up to be a faggot (sorry to break the news to my baby brother there … he still thinks he's straight, poor deluded kid). Every little girl who'd've rather worn blue jeans and climb a tree than play dress up with her Barbie dolls grew up to be a dyke (boy oh boy, I know a guy who's going to be awfully disappointed to find out I'm gay). And playing dress up at school for a day is absolutely going to create a whole graduating class full of drag queens and kings. Hell yeah. 'Cause Jesus said so!
Wait. Jesus didn't say any fucking thing about cross dressing, did he? Oops. My bad.
So, what did the school do? Did they stand up and say, "Get over it, you gutter-minded church-addled morons, it's a harmless gag. Nobody's turning gay. It was a fucking JOKE."
Nope. The spineless fucks apologized for offending anyone, and promised that Pineview Elementary would never ever again have any Wacky Week Opposite Days.
For fuck's sake.
Now would you call that fundy whipped? And why are all major establishments thus woosyfied? Is this just a USA thing?
10th April 2008 at 12:40 am | permalink |@gyro: fundie-whipped … that's nice. :-) I'll have to remember that for the next fundie post.
10th April 2008 at 1:01 am | permalink |What?! I used to wear my sister's dresses when I was like 4 years old, and it was not during "Wacky Week" lol.
10th April 2008 at 3:06 am | permalink |As a snooty European, I'd actually find this hilarious if it weren't happening in one of the most important nations on this planet.
Does that make me gay because I dress up in pink women's clothing including bra in a golf tournament supporting breast cancer research? We have raised over $5000 in two years at a small nine hole golf course in NH. Everyone loves it, we had six guys dress up the first year and about 12 last year. We are looking for 20 at least this year. Support the boobies!!!!
10th April 2008 at 5:24 am | permalink |*facepalm*
And to think, all these years I've looked like a *homosexual*….
10th April 2008 at 5:53 am | permalink |I think the fundies need to jump on a boat and go away together like their ancestors the pilgrims. Whats wierd about them is the further they move to fundamentalism, the more likely they are to marry 12 year olds!!
10th April 2008 at 6:58 am | permalink |The bigger issue here, IMO, is it seems clear that, as children, our sense of boundaries and "acceptable" behavior is not guided so much by social convention (or religious dogma/doctrine), as it is guided by the limits of imagination.
What is really, inherently wrong with this? What is the tangible harm? Absolutely nothing. No one is physically hurt (unless someone gives a wedgie to a pre-pubescent boy wearing a thong). It does not developmentally retard or affect the children. It does not impair their ability to socialize. It does not impair their cognitive development. –or at least it didn't. Now that the Fundies have gotten all spun into a tizzy over the whole affair, these children get a clear message that this is now something to be ashamed of.
What infuriates me about this is that adherence to puritanical notions of socially acceptable behavior and religious doctrine are apparently far, far more important than opening up a child's mind to the possibilities that the human condition may present. The message is clearly one of "don't do that if someone else may think it's shameful or 'creepy.'" And with that message comes the assassination of the potential of several hundred children's intellectual development.
@ alphabitch: This isn't so much about going after easy targets as it is about illustrating to inanity of socio-religious mores. These people really need to get beaten back into the rat hole from whence they came–at least until they can demonstrate a willingness to operate in a world governed by the day-to-day reality of human existence and not in the make-believe fantasy-land of the Invisible Voo-Doo Daddy in the Clouds and the words the fundies put into his/her/its mouth.
10th April 2008 at 7:21 am | permalink |I honestly don't see what the big deal is. My elementary school also had a "Wacky Week" when I was younger (they still have it, and the kids seems to love the activities), and one of the days was "opposite day". If dressing up in the opposite gender's clothing for something like this makes you gay, does say going as a priest for Halloween make you wanna rape boys? I sometimes hate my home state (Wisconsin), I really do!
10th April 2008 at 10:53 am | permalink |Anyone want to lay odds on the likelihood that at least one male member of the "Voice of Christian Youth America" is a closet cross-dressing knob-jobber?
10th April 2008 at 11:22 am | permalink |Correct me if I am wrong, but didn't jesus wear a dress? It may have been called robe but it was still a dress.
10th April 2008 at 12:16 pm | permalink |@phil: "I'd actually find this hilarious if it weren't happening in one of the most important nations on this planet." Oh, I see. Laugh at our mental deficiency, would you?! Pah. You snooty European bastards are all the same. ;-)
@Shawn: "Does that make me gay because I dress up in pink women's clothing including bra in a golf tournament supporting breast cancer research?" Yes, absolutely, 100% gay. Sorry to be the one to break it to you.
@Sarah: "… all these years I've looked like a *homosexual*…." Well, I wasn't going to say anything, but … *cough*
@Thomas P: "I think the fundies need to jump on a boat and go away together like their ancestors the pilgrims." That's a fabulous idea! Which nation full of "savages" should they go "civilize" this time? :-D
@Becca: "The message is clearly one of "don't do that if someone else may think it's shameful or 'creepy.'" And with that message comes the assassination of the potential of several hundred children's intellectual development." Granted, that is pretty much the same message peer pressure gives kids … but it should never come from genuine authority figures.
"These people really need to get beaten back into the rat hole from whence they came …" Good point. Thanks for the pep talk. ;-) So long as they keep coming up with shit like this, I won't be able to help myself anyhow. ;-)
@Jason: "I sometimes hate my home state (Wisconsin), I really do!" AHHHH … so Wacky Week is a Wisconsin thing then, eh? That might help explain the citizens' willingness to wear foam cheese hats in public …
@Haden: "… at least one male member of the "Voice of Christian Youth America" is a closet cross-dressing knob-jobber?" I think the problem here would be finding someone to bet against those odds. ;-)
@nocturna: "Correct me if I am wrong, but didn't jesus wear a dress?" But it was a MANLY dress. That doesn't count. BLASHPHEMER!!!
10th April 2008 at 3:33 pm | permalink |So, does my wearing of men's fashion override women's fashion if I'm female in "homo points" vs. "hetero points"? I would hope pants = 1 homo point and skirt = 1 hetero point. Plus, I should get points for bra/lacy panties/hairdo/etc. Unfortunately, for one day of cross dressing to make for a solid lifelong homosexual label, pants must equal nearly one million homo points, not counting penalty points for hugging my girlfriends in public while wearing said homo-pants! Maybe the fundie-whipped could publish a tract with the basic rules, that way our poor easily tainted children won't make these mistakes again.
10th April 2008 at 3:45 pm | permalink |What if the kids wanted to dress up like animals? Would there have been an outcry of "oh my goodness, they are encouraging the kids to be furries"?
Idiots.
10th April 2008 at 4:00 pm | permalink |@andrea: I don't know. Honestly, you might be too confused for even Jesus to straighten out. ;-)
@deletedsoul: God help the internet, the day those fuckwits find out what a "furry" is.
10th April 2008 at 4:19 pm | permalink |God help the internet, the day those fuckwits find out what a "furry" is.
OMFGPWNBBQ* - If they figure out what a "furry" is, their heads will explode . . . wait a second . . . that's not a bad idea.
brb. ;-)
* "Oh My Fucking God, Pakistani Women Need BBQ"
10th April 2008 at 4:37 pm | permalink |@becca: "their heads will explode" Hmmm … maybe someone should notify them?
*wonders what will happen to Barney*
10th April 2008 at 4:48 pm | permalink |[...] Idiots.read more | digg story [...]
10th April 2008 at 7:58 pm | trackback from Holy ****, Crossdressing Children! Rally the Fundies! : deletedblog: Life, Love and the Pursuit of Zombies.Jesus wore a dress. He wears a dress on every bloody image anyone's ever drawn of him. Seriously.
12th April 2008 at 6:48 am | permalink |@jojo: Perhaps, but at least he didn't wear heels or carry a purse.
12th April 2008 at 4:28 pm | permalink |True, but people who say "GUYS WHO WEAR DRESSES ARE GAY" should think about that one.
13th April 2008 at 9:15 am | permalink |@jojo: Yet another thing that might cause a fundie's head to explode. :-) Excellent!
13th April 2008 at 10:03 pm | permalink |so yeah.. like everyone else.. i find this disappointing that something that has gone on for YEARS across the STATES can all of a sudden be a problem. First off.. if the notice went out to parents stating this was going on and noone complained then it's no one else's buisness. No one else needs to be concerned if the parents aren't because its no one elses buisness but the parents and the teachers and admin of the school. I so don't see what the big freaking deal is. Kids dress up at Halloween in all kinds of things from the opposite genders to ghosts and vampires and angels and trashmen and doctors.. dressing up as these things doesn't make them what they are dressing up as anymore than dressing as the opposite sex makes them 'homosexuals'. Stupidest thing I've ever heard of.. Was there really nothing else going on in the state that was important that day other than kids dressing up for a fun day at school????
15th April 2008 at 7:39 am | permalink |"Correct me if I am wrong, but didn't jesus wear a dress?" But it was a MANLY dress. That doesn't count. BLASHPHEMER!!!
Hmmm, did he get married? - Did he go around with 12 close male friends for a significant poart of his life?
I think the circumstantial evidence is beginning to mount up here.
19th April 2008 at 1:21 pm | permalink |